relationships Archives - Relationship Coach

Love Yourself: Flaws and All

Ladies welcome to the Real Talk Relationship Series Episode Three: Love Yourself: Flaws and All! In this Real Talk episode, I sit down with my close friends Maya Caldwell, Krystal Haynes, and LaDonna Ouedraogo as they dish out the importance of self-care. During our discussion, each panelist provides personal testimonials of how they overcame life obstacles while learning how to love themselves. In addition, they provide practical tips on ways you can begin to love yourself with your flaws and all! Remember ladies: It’s all about giving yourself grace! Love Yourself: Flaws and All Catch up on other relationship-related stories here: Are REALLY Ready for Love? I Do, I Don’t Ummm… Maybe 🙄? Be Real, Do You Accept You for You? When Spirit Meets Soulmate Ladies, It’s Okay to be Single How to Build A Deeper Relationship with God Meet the Panel Maya, an Atlanta native is an actor, singer, and writer. She has performed in many theatre productions in Savannah and Atlanta. In addition, she’s performed in Stone Mountain Park Holiday Extravaganzas and the Children’s Museum of Atlanta. Maya is currently working on her new play and learning to truly love herself one day at a time. LaDonna, a Savannah native, has been on the road to self-love all of her life. She’s experienced the ups and downs of what things could or should look like. As an actor, self-love becomes a part of her journey that she must “master”. Thank you for listening as to her and her friends join Erica in the true discovery of self-love. It’s a love like no other. Krystal, a South Carolina native, is a Youtuber, faith-based blogger, and founder of Soul Care Naturals. Her ultimate goal is to encourage people to prosper in spirit, soul, and body just as Christ did while here on earth. Connect with them To find more about Krystal Haynes connect with her: Youtube: Krystal Prospers Instagram: @krystalprospers_ Blog: Krystal Prospers: Explore & Engage Business Site: Soul Care Naturals To find more about LaDonna Ouedraogo connect with her: Instagram: @ladonna__o Twitter:@grwngpurpose4 To find more about Maya Caldwell connect with her: Instagram: @mayacaldwell2464 Twitter: @mayacaldwell13 Hey beautiful people! Enjoy what you’ve watched? Share in the comment section below what stood out to you the most and what you took away. Can’t wait to hear your response!

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Ladies, It’s Okay to be Single

Ladies welcome to the Real Talk Relationship Series! This month, our focus is all about relationships. I know just by reading that word, many of you are cringing, but wait–before you hop to another link, I promise you have no need to fear. We’re here to help! And what better way to jumpstart this series than from a male’s perspective. Yes, you’ve read right! A man’s view. 😉 So, if any men are reading, this message is for you too! In this Real Talk episode, I sit down with my college friend Alton Hall. During our chat, Alton expounds on the crazy roadblocks in relationships and provides great tips on how to help you understand your emotions in order to find love within yourself! It’s all about being single and lovin’ it! Ladies, It’s Okay to Be Single! Catch up on other relationship stories here: Are REALLY Ready for Love? I Do, I Don’t Ummm… Maybe 🙄? Be Real, Do You Accept You for You? When Spirit Meets Soulmate Alton believes his purpose on Earth has always been to give love through acknowledgment. “I try my best to communicate with everyone on an individual level and I find people deeply appreciate it when you recognize greatness in them,” Alton said. “In uplifting others, I myself am truly lifted. I’m forever learning and that can wear you out if given from an empty place. So, I must be able to give with intention and through individual reflection. That is my source that never runs dry.” To find more about Alton connect with him: Facebook: Alton D. Hall https://www.facebook.com/alton.d.hall/ Instagram: @hallson https://www.instagram.com/hallson/ Twitter: @altonhall https://twitter.com/altonhall Hey beautiful people! Enjoy what you’ve watched? Share in the comment section below what stood out to you the most and what you took away. Can’t wait to here your response!

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Are You REALLY Ready For Love?

Are you in a relationship? Do you feel stuck? It is time to seek God and ask Him what to do. Once you receive your response the real question becomes: Am I Really Ready For Love? L.O.V.E, a four-letter word with much meaning, yet, is used too loosely. The word has become second nature and is used for everything. Prime example–Valentine’s Day. Now, before you judge me, just think about it. While women look forward to the holiday, most men do not–well except if they are single. Let’s be honest: ladies to receive a gift from a guy your heart leaps for joy. Men, just to walk around with a beautiful woman by your side, allows you to feel like a king. However, relationships shouldn’t be like that but much much more. Women, instead of chasing after a man to give a $5 stuffed animal, chase after God so He can provide you with the man who is necessary for you. Men don’t feel jealous of your friends because they have a girl and you don’t. Instead, surrender your heart to Christ and He will work things out in your favor. Although it’s easier said, it IS possible. Trust me. I was a sucker for men and wanted love. I wanted to receive a bag full of goodies and a card with the words “I love you” inside. In elementary school, at least I was able to get cards. but once high school and college came along, those gifts stopped. In July 2014, God revealed to me why I was single. Bottom line: I wasn’t ready for a relationship. To truly submit to a man, nourish and cherish him—Please! I could barely figure out who my real friends were. Thinking about what God shared with me, I could only agree with Him because He was right. As we grow older and look at the “role models” of entertainment from Kim to Kanye and Barak to Michelle, we wish to have a similar relationship one day. Let’s take Beyonce and Jay-Z for example. Since they have a child, great music careers and can often be seen together in photos with a smile plastered on their face, people automatically assume their marriage is true and their love is real. However, looks can be deceiving. No one knows what takes place behind Beyonce and Jay-Z’s close doors, so relationship goals shouldn’t focus on what you see from the naked eye on various screens. The Purpose of a Relationship It is important to take heed and hear God in order to find out if the person you are in a relationship with is truly for you. The purpose of a relationship is to grow and mature into marriage and shouldn’t be taken lightly. 1 Corinthians 7:1 reads,” … It is good to abstain from sexual relations.” In verses 8-9 it reads, “So I say to those who aren’t married and to widows—it’s better to stay unmarried, just as I am. But if they can’t control themselves, they should go ahead and marry. It’s better to marry than to burn with lust.” In other words, if a relationship is solely based on sex, the outward appearance of one’s mate and/or the amount of money or gifts one can receive, that relationship will not last. It is unclean and will not have an inheritance in the Kingdom of Christ. Final Thoughts My friends don’t fall for any and everything a person says he or she will do. Instead, seek and ask God for guidance. Don’t mope because you don’t have a valentine. Instead, praise God for the season you are currently in because when your Queen or Prince Charming comes more responsibilities will too. Always be true, trust and believe. Even though the journey can be tedious remember God will never put more on you than you can bear. Do you like what you’ve read? Share what you’ve received. I look forward to your comments below.

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“I Do”, “I Don’t” , “Ummm…Maybe?”🙄

Do you have a desire to get married? Are you constantly praying for a special someone to waltz into your life, pop the question and take you to a land of no tomorrow? I believe we all do. We all want that special someone to hear what we have to say, take it into consideration and provide us with solid advice. We all want that special someone who will take us for who we are and accept us on our days of good, bad and ugly. Although that special someone is out there for each and every one of us, in God’s timing, I believe it is important to prepare before that special someone comes our way. About three weeks ago, while scrolling through Instagram, I ran across an ad presented by Michael Pittman, a lead pastor of my church, the Gathering Oasis International. In his ad, he promoted a webinar that he would be hosting to showcase ways to create multiple streams of income and break poverty mindsets. To join the webinar the only thing he requested was that you sign up by clicking on the link that would be in his bio. Intrigued by his ad, I went to his bio, clicked on Linktree and chose the first link that appeared. Surprisingly, it had nothing to do with finances, but about fiancés and how to catch one. Okay okay, so not actually catch one, but how to pray for your future spouse. Turns out Michael and his wife, Amanda Pittman, were helping to promote their good friends, Jamal and Nicole Miller, founders of “The One University ” and their upcoming challenge, “Pray For Your Future Spouse”. Here’s what they had to say: After viewing Michael and Amanda’s video and reading more about the challenge on Jamal and Nicole’s website, I was sold. I had nothing to lose. I was single, seeking, and interested in learning how to prepare for my future spouse. Five days, five specific prayers, and five speakers each night! By Aug 23, I was floored with new knowledge and a new view on marriage and relationships as a whole. During the challenge, there were three main points that stood out to me the most and I’d like to share them with you: 1.) Pray your future spouse has a relationship with God. Tune your ears to wisdom and concentrate on understanding. – Proverbs 2:2 NLT Have you written your list yet? You know, the sheet filled with information you want your perfect wife or husband to portray and have? On my list, one of my must-haves in a man is one who has a solid foundation with God. This does not make your spouse perfect, but it shows he or she is striving to be more in tune with God and willing to die daily for Him. So, while you pray they have a relationship with God, ask He strengthen the one you currently have with Him. 2.) Pray they are healed from the inside out. Cast all of your cares upon Him, for He cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7 NKJV We all have a past. There is no doubt that something has taken place in our lives that we wish we could take away and let go of. Unfortunately, we cannot erase our past, but we can heal from it. This is why it is important we pray not only for our future spouse’s healing but ours as well. Ask God to reveal to you and your future spouse what is needed to let go of and give it to Him. Allow Him to heal you both from the inside out. 3.) Pray they are sexually pure. Honor the sanctity of marriage and keep your vows of purity to one another, for God will judge sexual immorality in any form, whether single or married. Hebrews 13:4 TBT The body you live in is not your own. It is not made by man’s hands. You were bought with a price, so you must honor God with your body. Pray you and your future spouse remain sexually pure even when temptation arises. Remember, God provided you with power and authority to say no when the enemy comes your way. FINAL THOUGHTS: Any of the points stated above stand out to you the most? If so, which one? What do you believe one should do when preparing for their future spouse? Share in the comments below. In my next post, I plan to dig deeper into this topic based on the response I receive, so stay tuned!

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18 Lessons I Learned in 2018 Part 1

Happy New Year beautiful people! 2019 has finally arrived and boy am I excited to see what God has in store! Essentially what l had in mind before writing this post was to share with you great ways to set up obtainable new year’s resolutions. However, as I began to think about how I would structure my post, the year of 2018 flashed before my eyes and immediately I began to write. I couldn’t help, but recall ALL God had brought me through during that year and those seasons in my life. From losing loved ones to broken relationships to new friendships, I couldn’t help but give praise to our Father because once again He had done it again. This month, instead of provided you with new year’s resolutions, I would like to share with you eighteen lessons I learned in 2018. Every Monday in January, you will see four lessons learned and an audio recording of myself expressing my thoughts on each lesson. I pray you enjoy these sessions and that they are beneficial to what you may have experienced or what you maybe currently going through now. So, let’s get started! Below are the first four lessons I learned in 2018: 1.)With God all things are possible. This paramount phrase comes from the beloved scripture in Matthew 19 verse 26. You see in this passage Jesus explains to His disciples what believers must be willing to change/ give up in their lives in order to be in right standings with His Father before entering into the kingdom of heaven. After listing a plethora of things, Peter asks Jesus (in my own words of course) “Well, Jesus since people do these things on the regular, how can they be saved?” Jesus responds, “With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” Wow! What a heartwarming statement. This lesson for me was life-changing, simply because this scripture revealed to me God’s true love for me. In all of my mishaps, mistakes, and mess-ups in 2018, God still had favor over my life. When people let me down, God was right there to pick me up. When my faith began to waver and I wanted to quick, God poured His life into me and whispered to me that I’d be okay and I’d make it through. You see, man can only do so much, but God truly held down the fort and for that, I can do nothing, but thank Him for bringing me through. 2.) Be careful who you allow in your circle. Last summer, my faith was tested big time in my relationships. Specifically with my family and friends. The friendship, which I thought was sent solely from God, turned out to be the total opposite. In all honesty, I had mistaken God’s voice as my own. During that season in my life, I found myself in a mind roller coaster, questioning a lot of things in Christ which I once was so sure of. I began to isolate myself from my dear loved ones all because of words received which was said to be from God. Prior to that friendship, I truly thought I had my life together and my relationship with God was solid. However, that theory turned out to be far from true. It was during that process of walking in wilderness, God revealed to me that I could never stop growing in Him, so I needed to stop trying. Although that season in my life was trying, God revealed to me more of who He’d called me to be and more of Him. He pushed me out of my comfort zone and thought me how to put my trust solely in Him and not in man. 3.) Love yourself, flaws and all. Big nose, big lips, crazy hair don’t care… ok ok I’m getting there lol. Do know this lesson is still a growing process, but God is helping me to love myself even more on a day to day basis. When I began to doubt myself or think negative on my past decisions, I am reminded that the Holy Spirit lives within me and with Him I am a new creature, for old things have passed away, while ALL THINGS has become new! (2 Corinthians 5:17) 4.) It’s okay not to be okay. In 2018, for as long I can remember I had this image engraved in my mind I had to be perfect 24/7. Where did the image come from? I’m not quite sure, just know it hindered me from being my true authentic self. It really wasn’t until 2018 that it dawned on me that it is okay NOT to be okay. I had to learn to cast my cares, worries, and sorrows to God even when they hurt, for in due time He would exalt me and raise me up while in despair. (1 Peter 5:6-7) Through close bonds with pastors, a praying mother, and caring friends God saw fit that I made it through! Alright, that’s all for part 1. Tune in next Monday for part 2 of 18 Lessons I Learned in 2018! Check out the audio version of part 1 below:

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